More Money Madness

I've been catching up on blogs as you can see. I've enjoyed some camping and visitng time with my kids.

Yesterday was another day of money mess and internet irritation and going round and round the endless loop that exists in the matrix.

 The writing course that I jumped through so many last minute hoops to get in on time,  got cancelled. I received an email from PayPal telling me this (with no reason why) and I got this 4 days late as it was sent to an email site I hardly ever use. That too is it's own crazy story that I won't get into.

I felt my whole body get anxious as I got nowhere fast trying to resolve any of it. Visa shows that the monies are paid, and there is no credit back, so I can't even make the transaction again and I'm guessing that it was an address glitch. I had a feeling it would happen when my address did not show up correctly on my Visa statement, and I've gone down twice to change it as they don't allow internet changes.

So before I made the transaction, I quickly checked on the Visa site to see if my address was updated. It wasn't, to I used the address that Visa was still showing on the website, NOT the corrected address. After getting the email saying my transaction was cancelled, I noticed that my address had finally been updated and corrected on their site. ARRG!

Who knows what glitch happened to cancel my important transaction, but after I was ready to calm down and tell the Truth about it all, it was amazing how it all became nothing. I planned these wonderful details to trick myself into believing it is all so real and so important.

As I wrote to a friend,
My stress and anxiety always comes from believing that each detail is real, where as, I planned each detail to fool me into thinking it was real! That's the Truth and it always brings an inner awareness of appreciation (when I remember to remember)!

You would think that it would be easier to remember and this stuff wouldn't be happening, but anyone who is going through this waking up process can testify as to how many layers of cover up there are. And this too is perfectly planned so that I would not discover this truth right away. If I had gotten through a few layers and saw the truth, the gig would have been up a long time ago.

There would be no fantastic movie to get lost in. And there would be no great treasure hunt to enjoy now.

And update on my cheque that I deposited Aug first. It went through my employer's account a week ago today and my bank (the SAME bank as hers) is still holding my money until midnight tomorrow. (That's almost 11 days). If I didn't know that each detail was planned by me FOR me, I would be ranting and raving to all my illusions and expecting them to change!